Below Sea Grade


A boy came home from school with his exam results. “What did you get?” asked his father. “My marks are under water,” said the boy. “What do you mean ‘under water’?” ” They are all below ‘C’ (sea) level!”


No Good


Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That’s why I say she’s no good!


One Year Old Father

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: 1 year older then me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born


Funny Maths

Father: Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8
Father: So? Son: On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8.
On Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8. If she can’t make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?


Smart Burglar

A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.
“You’ll get your chance in court,” said the Police officer.
“No, no no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying for years.”


Unwanted Guests

It was at a party and the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn’t know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then her husband got an idea….
He turned to the crowd of guests and said “Will those who are from the brides side of the family stand up please?” About twenty people stood.Then he asked ” Will those who are from the groom side of the family stand up as well?” about twenty five people stood up. Then He smiled and said
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“Will all those who stood please leave, this is a birthday party”.


Little Johny Going To Have A Wife

At Sunday school they were teaching how God created everything,including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, “Johnny, what is the matter?” Little Johnny responded, “I have pain in my side. I think I’m going to have a wife.”


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