Funny Blonde Jokes - Page 2

Blonde Giving Interview

A Blonde airhead goes for a job interview in an office.

The interviewer starts with the basics. “So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?”

The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for half a minute before replying “Ehhhh… 22!”

The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. “And can you tell us your height, please?”

The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces “Five foot two!”

This isn’t looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something the interviewee won’t have to count, measure, or lookup.

“Just to confirm for our records, your name please?”

The airhead bobs her head from side to side for about ten seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying “MANDY!”

The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks – “What in the world were you doing when I asked you your name?”

“Ohhhh, that!” replies the airhead… ” I was just running through that song – ‘Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear..


Email This Post Email This Post

Blonde’s Thanksgiving

It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for herself alone. The next day, her mother called to see how everything went.

“Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much trouble trying to eat the turkey!” said the daughter.

“Did it not taste good?” her mother asked.

“I don’t know,” the blonde said. “It wouldn’t sit still!”


Email This Post Email This Post

Blood Test

Doctor: Mrs. Samantha, you look exhausted.

Samantha (A blonde) : I am. When your nurse phoned me yesterday and told me that I have to come today for a blood test, I spent the whole night studying for it.


Email This Post Email This Post

Road Line Painter

A blonde got a job as a road line-painter. She paints 5 miles on the first day, 2 miles on the second day and 1 on the third day.

“You get worse and worse every day!” yelled his boss.

“That is because the bucket gets further and further away every day.” said blonde with a cute smile.


Email This Post Email This Post

Same Color

One day blonde Samantha asks her friend Rosy, “So Rosy what did you get for Christmas?”

Rosy, “Oh see that brand new red Ferrari outside?”

Samantha says, “OOOOH WOW!!! I got the same exact color tie!”


Email This Post Email This Post

Steelhead in River

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, “Excuse me, ladies, I’d like to see your fishing licenses.”

“We don’t have any.” replied the first blonde.

“Well, if your going to fish, you need fishing licenses.” said the Game Warden.

“But officer,” replied the second blonde,”we aren’t fishing. All we have are magnets at the end of our lines and we’re collecting debris off the bottom of the river.”

The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. “Well, I know of no law against it,” said the Game Warden, “take all the debris you want.” And with that, the Game Warden left.

As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. “What a dumb Fish Cop,” the second blonde said to the other two, “doesn’t he know that there are steelhead in this river?!


Email This Post Email This Post

Blonde in Factory

A foreman of a factory was making his rounds inspecting how all of the workers were doing their jobs. “Well” he said to one blond worker, “I see you are doing a very diligent job stamping all of the boxes ‘THIS SIDE UP’. “Yes” the worker replied, eager to please, “and just to be extra sure I stamped the bottom also!”


Email This Post Email This Post
Page 2 of 27«12345»...Last »