Funny Jokes - Page 2

Johnny asked to Sam what they will do that night.

Johnny asked to Sam what they will do that night.
Sam said “we will flip a coin”

Then Johnny said “If it comes head, we will go for movies. If tails, we will play cards, if it stands on edge, we will study”!


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A customer ordered a cup of coffee in a restaurant!

A customer ordered a cup of coffee in a restaurant! The waiter served the coffee. The customer found a fly in the coffee. He called the waiter.

Customer: How do I drink this coffee!

Waiter: Don’t you know how to drink a coffee?

Customer: Waiter, see, there is a fly in my coffee.

Waiter: Oh yes sir, you are right! There is a fly in your coffee.

Customer: Waiter, I said, there is a fly in MY coffee (He stressed the word MY)

Waiter: Oh don’t worry sir, the fly won’t drink much!

Customer: Waiter, it is swimming in my coffee.

Waiter: Sir, do you want me to get a lifeguard for the fly sir?

(Annoyed) Customer: the fly dead, it’s irritating!

Waiter: I guess, it doesn’t know how to swim properly.

Customer: How do I drink this coffee?

Waiter: Don’t you know how to drink? I will teach you!

He drank the coffee! And said, this is how you should drink a coffee.


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Because it was suffering from a virus!

Why did the computer consult with the doctor?

Because it was suffering from a virus!


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Sunny: My wife is a very careful driver.

Sunny: My wife is a very careful driver.

Vijay: How do you know that?

Sunny: She always slows down when passing a red light!


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After Our Last Argument

After Our Last Argument,

I Told My Girlfriend,

“I Hope Your Next Boyfriend

Appreciates The Improvements

I’ve Made In You .


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Boys are stronger than Girls??

Ohh Please !!

No Ways!!!

Can they carry 8kg of shopping bag?

Can they go a week eating only salad?

Can they face a heart break?


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A cute prayer 4 you – Dearest Friends:

A cute prayer 4 U – Dearest Friends:

May God break the front teeth of those people, who secretly plot evil
against you..

So that you know your enemies by their smiles!


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We Need A Way Of Telling People

We Need A Way Of Telling
People They Have Bad
Breath Without Hurting
Their Feelings
Like
“Well I Am Bored
Let’s Go Brush Our Teeth …


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If You Look At The Sky Tonight

If You Look At The Sky Tonight

And Notice That The Brightest Star Is Missing,

I Swear I Have No Clue

How The Hell I Fell From Sky But I’m OK


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Human-beings get rich as they grow old:

Human-beings get rich as they grow old:

Silver in Hair;

Gold in Teeth;

Sugar in Blood;

Precious Stones in Kidney;

And a never ending supply of Gas!


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I bought a new printer because

I bought a new printer because

it was cheaper than ink refills.

Now I’m wondering how long before

new cars are cheaper than fuel.


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Raju: What’s the difference between us and Camels?

Raju: What’s the difference between us and Camels?

Rohan: They can work without drinking for 7 days

and

We can drink without working for 7 days!


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Then we’ll sell it OK? Fifty-Fifty

May our friendship turn into silver, silver into gold, gold into diamonds… and may our diamonds be forever… Then we’ll sell it OK? Fifty-Fifty


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Three dreams of a man

Three dreams of a man: To be as handsome as his mother thinks. To be as rich as his child believes. To have as many women as his wife suspects


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This Donkey Will Be Free After Reading This Sms

Child Donkey: Mum with whom shall I play, every donkey is busy. Mother Donkey: Don’t worry son, see here, this donkey will be free after reading this SMS.


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With Idiot For Ever

Husband asks, do you know the meaning of WIFE. It means… Without Information fighting every time! WIFE says No, it means – With Idiot For Ever


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Galileo: Great Mind

GALILEO:
great mind
EINSTEIN:
genius mind
NEWTON:
extraordinary mind
BILL GATES
brilliant mind
ME:
master mind
YOU:
oh!
never mind


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I Have A Confession To Mak

I have a confession to make
ever since I met u its been hard for me to 4get u
every night I see u in my dreams
and find myself shouting
GHOST GHOST !!!


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SAY NO TO EXAMS

It takes 15 trees to
produce the amount
of paper that we
use to write one exam.

join us in promoting the noble
cause of saving trees.
SAY NO TO EXAMS


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I Miss You Always…

You must be a good runner because
you are always running in my mind,
you must be a good thief because
you have stolen my heart,
and
i am always a bad shooter because
I Miss You Always…


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