Funny Junk

You worry too much about your job. Stop it. You are not paid enough to worry.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter, and Bill Clinton are on the titanic. When it starts to sink Carter yells, “Quick, save the women and children!” Nixon: “Screw the women and children” Clinton: “Do we have time?”