Funny Junk

Tom : How should I convey the news to my father that I’ve failed?
David: You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year’s performance repeated.

Teacher : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook.

Teacher : Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam : It’s a family tradition.
Teacher : What do you mean ?
Sam : Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Teacher : What about your mother ?
Sam : She’s a woman.

Q: Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?
A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.