You Know your 60th birthday is coming when
Happy hour is a nap.
Things you buy now won’t wear out.
People call at 9 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?”
You and your teeth don’t sleep together anymore.
It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
You begin every other sentence with, “Nowadays…”
You realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.
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A couple have not been getting along for years, so the husband thinks,‘I‘ll buy my wife a cemetery plot for her 60th birthday.‘Well, you can imagine her disappointment.The next year, her birthday rolls around again and this time he doesn‘t get her anything. She says, ‘Why didn‘t you get me a birthday present!?‘He replies, ‘You didn‘t use what I got you last year!‘
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The man walked over to the perfume counter and told the clerk he’d like a bottle of Chanel No. 5 for his wife’s 60th birthday.
“A little surprise, eh?” smiled the clerk.
“You bet,” answered the customer. “She’s expecting a cruise.”
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All of your favorite movies are now re-released in color.
At 60, before crossing a room you look both ways.
At 60, you realize that you were built for comfort, not speed.
At 60, your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
At 60, conversations with people your own age often become a duel of ailments.
At 60, it takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
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