Text Message Autocorrect Chaos
I texted my boss 'I'll have the report done by Friday.' Autocorrect changed it to 'I'll have the report done by Fried Egg.' Now I work in catering.


















I texted my boss 'I'll have the report done by Friday.' Autocorrect changed it to 'I'll have the report done by Fried Egg.' Now I work in catering.
I tried a new recipe last night. It turned out so badly, the smoke alarm filed a noise complaint and the fire extinguisher asked for hazard pay.
Breaking news keeps talking about Egypt vs Iran like it's a sports match. I'm checking ESPN, Fox Sports, nothing. Turns out it's just geopolitical tensions, not a playoff. I've been disappointed by worse sports coverage.
I'm so bad at paying attention in meetings, I once nodded along for 20 minutes before realizing they were just reading the Slack status updates out loud.
I told myself I'd hit the gym five days a week. Turns out I was hitting the snooze button five times before my workout.
San Jose fire departments need three things: water, equipment, and a really good explanation for why they're always arriving after the Instagram photos are already trending.