The real meaning of Study as given by engineering students

S = Sitting
T = Talking
U = Unlimited
D = Dreaming
Y = Yawning,

So get ready to study now :p

Wanna see the programs in my HP-48GX?

Hey baby, let’s make a stress-strain curve together.

Your body has the nicest arc length I’ve ever seen.

Let’s convert our potential energy to kinetic energy.

We’re as compatible as two similar Power Macintosh’s
.
You’re hotter than a bunsen burner set to full power!

Our love is like dividing by zero…. you cannot define it

How about you and I go back to my place and form a covalent bond?

I won’t stop bugging you until I get the address of your home page.

You fascinate me more than the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus.

Why don’t we measure the coefficient of static friction between me and you?

My love for you is like a concave up function because it is always increasing.

By looking at you I can tell you’re 36-25-36, which by the way are all perfect squares.

I’m attracted to you so strongly, scientists will have to develop a fifth fundamental force.

You are always late to meetings.

You know what http:// stands for.

You can’t read your own handwriting.

All your sentences begin with “what if”.

You want an 24X CD ROM for Christmas.

You can understand anything Al Gore says.

Your IQ is a higher number than your weight.

The only jokes you receive are through e-mail.

Your laptop computer costs more than your car.

You see a good design and still have to change it.

Your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone.

You bought your wife a new DVD Writer for her birthday.

Your wife hasn’t the foggiest idea what you do at work.

You have more friends on the Internet than in real life.

You spend more time on your home computer than in your car.

Your idea of a “good read” is the Edmund Scientific catalog.

Your spouse sends you an email instead of calling you to dinner.

You have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

You order pizza over the Internet and pay for it through your home banking software.

You talk about the high resolution and picture-in-picture capability of your big screen TV while everybody is watching the Superbowl.

There are four engineers traveling in a car; a mechanical engineer, a chemical engineer, an electrical engineer and a computer engineer.

The car breaks down. “Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized. We’ll have to strip down the engine before we can get the car working again”, says the mechanical engineer.

“Well”, says the chemical engineer, “it sounded to me as if the fuel might be contaminated. I think we should clear out the fuel system.”

“I thought it might be an grounding problem”, says the electrical engineer, “or maybe a faulty plug lead.”

They all turn to the computer engineer who has said nothing and say: “Well, what do you think?” “Ummm – perhaps if we all get out of the car and get back in again?”

In the high way, there is a big pit, and many accidents happens in this pit every day three workers discussed to solve the problem. The first suggest to send ambulance car beside the pit to be standby for any accident that send him quickly to hospital!!!!

The second said, no, he may die in the way to hospital, so is better to build hospital beside the pit !!!!

The third, the most clever said is too expensive to build hospital beside the pit, so we have to fill this pit in the highway and dig one beside the hospital in the city

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, you’re an engineer — you’re in the wrong place.” So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, “So, how’s it going down there in hell?” Satan replies, “Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there’s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next.” God replies, “What??? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake — he should never have gotten down there; send him up here.” Satan says, “No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him.” God says, “Send him back up here or I’ll sue.”

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, “Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?”

Real Engineers consider themselves well dressed if their socks match.
Real Engineers buy their spouses a set of matched screwdrivers for their birthday.
Real engineers have a non-technical vocabulary of 800 words.
Real Engineers repair their own cameras, telephones, televisions, watches, and automatic transmissions.
Real Engineers say “It’s 70 degrees Fahrenheit, 25 degrees Celsius, and 298 Kelvin” and all you say is “Isn’t it a nice day?”
Real Engineers wear badges so they don’t forget who they are. Sometimes a note is attached saying “Don’t offer me a ride today. I drove my own car”.
Real Engineers’ politics run towards acquiring a parking space with their name on it and an office with a window.
Real Engineers know the “ABC’s of Infrared” from A to B.
Real Engineers know how to take the cover off of their computer, and are not afraid to do it.
Real Engineers’ briefcases contain a Phillips screwdriver, a copy of “Quantum Physics”, and a half of a peanut butter sandwich.
Real Engineers don’t find the above at all funny.

The great mathematician John Von Neumann was consulted by a group who was building a rocket ship to send into outer space. When he saw the incomplete structure, he asked, “Where did you get the plans for this ship?”
He was told, “We have our own staff of engineers.”
He disdainfully replied: “Engineers! Why, I have complete sewn up the whole mathematical theory of rocketry. See my paper of 1952.”

Well, the group consulted the 1952 paper, completely scrapped their 10 million dollar structure, and rebuilt the rocket exactly according to Von Neumann’s plans. The minute they launched it, the entire structure blew up. They angrily called Von Neumann back and said: “We followed your instructions to the letter. Yet when we started it, it blew up! Why?”
Von Neumann replied, “Ah, yes; that is technically known as the blow-up problem – I treated that in my paper of 1954.”