Short Funny Jokes

Who’s the father

Wife : Honey my stomach is getting bigger i think im pregnant !
Husband : yea, and i kno2 who’s the father!!!!
Wife : who ?
Husband :McDonalds

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Height of Attitude

A cockroach’s last words to a man who is about to kill him:
“Go ahead and kill me, You coward!
You are jealous of me because your wife is afraid of me and NOT AFRAID OF YOU !

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Correct Figure

People focusing on 12-12-12, have got it all wrong.

The correct numbers are 36-24-36.

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Girl and Boss

Girl Came Angrily Out Of Boss’s Cabin

A Friend Asked- Why are you so sad?

Girl- He Asked Me are you Free Tonight?

I Said Absolutely Free Sir…

That idiot Gave 60 Pages To Type! :-(

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Little Johnny At Convenience Store

Little Johnny goes to the manager at convenience store and asked, “Is this store open all day, seven days a week, 365 days a year?”

“Yes,” the manager answered, puzzled at the question.

“Well, then,” he continued as he walked out, “why are there locks on the doors?”

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Mechanic vs Officer

A mechanic called one of his customers, a bank officer after a check bounced. “The check you sent me to pay your bill has bounced!” He yelled!

The officer replied,”well, so did all my car problems that you fixed!”

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Hard to Find

Mr. Anderson: I am very lucky. When I talk with my wife, she always bows her head.

Mr. Smith: That’s great man, wives like that are hard to find.

Mr. Anderson: Not really, she bows because she is taller than me.

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